Cant stand to see you any other way
by IcyColdTou
Summary: TouyaJin romance. Touya leaves Jin then finds him later on, fluff mostly.


Touya/Jin fanfic THIS IS YAOI, I don't want flames so..go.lick a sticky note or something. My second Touya/Jin fanfic, reviews and comments are appreciated, flames can be tolerated or shreaded..either way -.- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------  
  
Of all places I could of wandered to, Of all people I could of left behind, Of all emotions I could be feeling right now.  
  
Slowly I walk, the snow not making a single sound under my feet, seeming to send shivvers of power up my legs, offering to me.  
  
Yet for now, I ignore those offerings and continue,  
  
Trudging.  
  
My icy blue eyes, pupiless and as I'm told, similar to my element, dart around. Making sure that there are no others here.  
  
Its about -11...rather warm for where I am.  
  
I, Touya, Ex-shin obi, Master of ice  
  
Have wandered back to the lands from whence I came. The lands that could, of all places offer me freedom, offer me happiness,  
  
Offer me, Perhaps, Something to rid me of this deep guilty feeling within the pit of my stomach.  
  
Or perhaps, Sleep free from dreams of that night.  
  
I close my eyes, Icy cold tears going down my pale cheeks, Clinging to me before releasing and freezing, falling into the snow below my feet.  
  
I sit, Letting my pack fall carelessly to the snow beside me. I fight to gain control of these emotions which have sneaked passed my barrier.  
  
The temperature around me lowers, The snow swirling slightly around me, trying to comfort me.  
  
Nothing, Can comfort me.  
  
Nothing, But..  
  
Jin.  
  
Yes, I didn't wish to admit it at first. But I need him, I miss him. Jin  
  
Once again, the two of us had gotton ourselves into yet another fight. Probably about something stupid, I forgot it, Tried to anyway,  
  
It had been a few months since we had lost at the Dark Tournament, He and I had been in some random town in the Makai..  
  
And we got into the fight, Over something..  
  
Ahh yes, the light. It had been over the light. Me making a small comment about not having one. He telling me he had found one,  
  
I getting mad, He readily fighting back in a joking way.  
  
I..I.hit him.  
  
At that moment, we both snapped, the two of us falling to the ground, scuffling like mad until finally I was on my back.  
  
(chapter two)  
  
I remember how little air I was able to get into my lungs, I remember my ice swords tip dangerously close to your jugular vein, barely nicking that white skin which then added a splash of crimson liquid.  
  
I had hurt you, Phyisically, Emotionally? I'm sure of it. The look in your eyes told me this.  
  
We both retreated about this time, My ice sword disappearing, the winds returning to the point where I could breathe once more.  
  
Both of us, I know were shaking and finally I stood, brushing myself off before turning and beginning to walk away, you shouting to me.  
  
'Tou! Wai' up!'  
  
"no Jin."  
  
Your eyes were wide before tears I could tell were coming  
  
'I'm Sorry!'  
  
I whirled around, eyes narrowed  
  
"You have nothing to be sorry for, I don't deserve your apologies, Never apologise to me Jin. You could never do anything to be sorry for."  
  
You looked confused  
  
'Then.why?'  
  
"Because.I could of killed you."  
  
I remember the tears as I ran, you yelling and trying to find me among the cover of the trees,  
  
Months, Have passed.  
  
And here we are. Here I am.  
  
Alone.  
  
In the lands of ice.  
  
God how I miss you.  
  
Yet many things still bother me. Why had I hit you? Why Why Why Why Why.  
  
Why had I hit my Koibito?  
  
As if on instinct I look to my hand, the fist that had hit you.and the temperature lowers further, proving my sorrow and pain.I squeeze my eyes shut.  
  
"I'm so sorry." I state the the winds blowing around me, as if they will take my apology to you.I half pray that by some odd logic they would.  
  
"I.hit you.why did I hit you? God.. I'm so sorry Jin."  
  
I bow my head, old thoughts returning.  
  
(chapter three)  
  
We had always been so very careful with each other. You always treating me as if I would shatter, I doing the same to you.fearing that you would blow away with your winds or something.  
  
When you got into those moods, I would comfort you.  
  
When I became bothered by my past, You would be there.always there.  
  
During our lovemaking you were so very careful, so very very careful. I found it adorable, how you treated me with such care and despite what I said it ment the world to me, how I was so important to you.  
  
Around this moment it clicks and my eyes snap open in shock, relization hitting me like a brick in the face.  
  
Jin.. Is my light.  
  
That's why without him I feel so alone, So consumed by darkness.  
  
I bury my face in my hands, I had left my light, My love, My Koibito, My Jin.  
  
(chapter five)  
  
A month has passed, and I have gone back, searching For Jin.  
  
One evening I find the Master of Wind in a bar, drinking and laughing happily with a group of demons whom I do not know.they too laugh and just like this I take a small step back, the door to the bar swinging closed.  
  
I don't know how long I stood there, Minutes, Hours. Eternity  
  
It sure seemed like it.  
  
Fighting to keep myself from crying on the spot, Ice Masters do not Cry, Ice Demons do not cry,  
  
I am cold like my element, My heart is, My soul is, My personality, My very body is.  
  
I will not cry, Or let the fact that Jin has moved on bother me so.  
  
He is happy, I should be happy.  
  
Happy is such a stupid word.  
  
Around this time I whirl around, storming off like a furious demon who has waisted its time. So I have.  
  
Love is such a stupid thing, It gives you happiness, Then in the next second, Your crying out in agony, The pain being too much to bear.  
  
I grit my teeth, upon reaching a forest I slam my fist into a tree, forcing myself to calm down.  
  
"At least he is happy."  
  
I manage to snarl out those five words, My light is happy, I should be happy that he is happy...  
  
And without me.  
  
Silently I begin to head off, looking as cold and emotionless as ever.  
  
"Light, Love, Happiness, such stupid words.Ningens must of come up with them."  
  
I state darkly, continuing my trouncing before I find within a few hours that I've just made a massive circle and am now standing near the bar.  
  
For some odd ball reason, Something tells me to go over.  
  
Figuring I havent got anything else to do I go over.  
  
What I see, What I feel, Infuriates me.  
  
Jin is drunk, yet he is trying to get a demon off of him.  
  
They deliberately bought him drinks, To get him drunk, Probably went broke knowing how Jin drinks, Yet they did all this,  
  
For one reason.  
  
They, As do most, Do find the Master of Wind attractive, And here the three of them have Jin pinned down, And are actually raping him.  
  
One of them roll him over onto his stomach,, preparing to have a little bit more fun with Jin, and Jin's yelp finally jump starts my mind.  
  
My feet slam down as I step closer, one of the demons look up giving a smirk and saying  
  
'hey, wanna be next twirp? If not you better get out of here.'  
  
My eyes flare, reaching up with my left hand I grab part of my cloak, yanking the entire thing off and throwing it aside.  
  
"Get off of him."  
  
I command, my voice is freezing, sub zero.  
  
How DARE they touch Jin? He is mine.  
  
MINE  
  
No one else can touch him.  
  
They merely laugh and go back to what their doing.  
  
Fine, Fools,  
  
"Die."  
  
I state quietly, my voice dripping like venom, eyes aflare as I feel the cold swirl in my body, I can hear each of the demons heartbeats..  
  
I watch, As slowly they each stop, eyes getting wide as they feel their bodies freezing.  
  
From the inside out.  
  
The worst way to go.  
  
I take a step forward, pulling the demons off of Jin, and crouching down, gently running a free hand over Jin's left cheek, barely touching a bruise.Your eyes are out of focus, you just barely mouth 'Tou?' They injured you, They touched you, They HURT you...  
  
My gaze snaps upwards as I look at the leader of the demons, watching the ice slowly form below his feet, freezing him solid before the ice seeming to shatter in a command, frozen demon body parts going everywhere.  
  
The other two demons suffer the same fate, I kill them, Without even a second thought.  
  
They deserve it.  
  
I look back to Jin who blinks, before passing out.  
  
I give a small sigh, gently and very carefully picking you up which is by no means an easy task. Your almost twice my height, and despite your appearance you are heavy.  
  
Not heavy heavy but still heavy enough for me to have trouble carrying you. I go back into the bar, shooting glares at anyone who looks at you and I.most thinking about touching you I can tell. I snarl aloud, getting a few of them to scatter. So I'm pissed off.  
  
I have good reason to be!  
  
I demand a room, getting one I pay for it before snatching the key and heading up the stairs. Eventually after much hard work I get you into the bed and I lay you down, locking the door and tossing the key on a nearby table.  
  
The rooms are shit, But at least its safe, And its just us.  
  
I sit down on the bed beside you, watching your breathing. Theres another bruise on your side.turning a dark blue like color..  
  
God how hard did they hit you?  
  
I gently run my hand over the bruise, wishing I could take it away as I did the demons lives.  
  
I look up to your face, gently brushing your crimson bangs out of your eyes, I hardly ever did that.  
  
I always wanted to yet didn't wish for you to think I was such a mushy type of guy.  
  
Damn stupid pride, But my pride is who I am,  
  
Just as you and your innocent nature, Is who you are.  
  
(chapter six)  
  
Hours pass and I stay awake, not at all tired.  
  
Okay so I am tired, REALLY damn tired actually, But I want to be awake when you wake up like you always were for me.  
  
:Finally your eyes open, You blink, Mumbling something about 'damn headaches'  
  
I watch as you slowly realize where you are, Your eyes meet mine.  
  
And neither of us can speak, I know your confused.  
  
I watch as your eyes narrow slightly,  
  
Your mad.  
  
I can tell.  
  
I visibly droop my head, closing my eyes.  
  
Always submissive, To you.  
  
Only you.  
  
"I'm so sorry for leaving. I shouldn't of left you.I know your mad.But I'm sorry Jin, Without you.I'm alone in the dark.I.need my light. You, I need you, my light.my Koibito.."  
  
I don't open my eyes, don't lift my head.I wait for you to speak to do anything.  
  
Eventually I feel a warm touch on my cheek before going to my chin, lifting my head. I open my eyes, meeting your shimmering ones.  
  
You give me a small grin,  
  
"Aw tha's cute.I'm glad yer back Tou.I missed yeh.yeh kno?"  
  
I give a small smile in reply, and gently rub my cheek against your hand now, eyes showing I'm content.  
  
"I know."  
  
You grin further, proving that your happy as hell right now, That's better.  
  
Cant stand to see you any other way. 


End file.
